I know, I know, we live in a city. A big one. A humungous one, even, that affords many excellent niceties only a larger metropolis can offer.
Still. Still…
This week’s heat finally forced me to attack my most-loathed chore as a (rental) householder: the replacement of several slats of my jalousie windows with gigantic, ghetto-ready box fans. Yeah, it’s stunningly unnattractive, but when the mercury hits a certain point, I’ll do almost anything to increase the flow of air in the hideous stank soup that is the air chez E-Z-Bake Ovenâ„¢. In fact, I’m typing this naked right now!
It’s always a narsty job, but the sheer amount of filth that must be wiped off the windows pre-removal seems to have grown exponentially in the past few years. Have we crapped up the environment so that things are that much dirtier? Or have we perhaps crapped up the environment so that it’s that much drier, creating barnloads of extra loose dirt to swirl around before settling in my apartment?
More importantly, can I use this turn of events to double-up on ire and take umbrage against my next-door neighbors’ use of gas-powered leaf blowers to blow the dirt off of their driveway? And what’s up with those retards, anyway? Does someone not understand that all they’re doing with those mother-humpin’ leaf-blowers is shooting a bunch of filth arrows in the air, to fall to earth they know not where?
They’re falling in my apartment, you environment-killing assholes! Yeah!!!
And I’ve got the spent pile of sodden paper towels to prove it…
xxx
c
Photo by ♫axime via Flickr, used under a Creative Commons license.
Sorry ’bout the heat, dude. Look at the bright side: You could be living here where it has been raining non-stop since March and we’ve come accept the damp, toxic molds that are growing everywhere as new roomates.
And for gods’ sake, please papertowel the sweat off your chair when you’re done…
“In fact, I’m typing this naked right now!”
Now that is going to be great fodder for a “Searches, we get searches”.
I’m also in a rental place with no a/c, so I feel your pain. Man, oh man do I feel your pain.
I’ve taken to lounging inside wearing a sports bra and boxer shorts.