Earl - I started writing a hella long comment, then realized you…I…the world (or at least, that slice of it who drops by here looking for answers) might be better served by putting it front & center, in its own post. B/c this is a big question, my brother. Hopefully, you’ll let me know if it’s helpful, and how it could be more so.

I have been wrestling with demons that bear some resemblance to your own, although kind of in reverse. I get paid to write, have never been paid to do anything else, but the only reason I do it, really, is because I’m good enough to get paid for it and apparently too lazy (or frightened) to attempt making a living at anything else. I occasionally don’t mind it, but I don’t love it. I’ve never loved it and I’ve often hated it.

And I know that part of the reason I continue to write is because I’m highly skeptical of my ability to do anything else. I can’t imagine what else someone would pay me to do. It feels sometimes as if it’s the only asset I have. Which is why I cling to it, and resent it. And I feel guilty for resenting it because it beats the hell out of most people’s income-earning options. Would I rather be an accountant or a ditch digger or a hotel clerk? No, I would not.

So I’m trying to imagine myself as something other than a writer, someone able to pay the bills without all the angst and grumbling that have become part of my process. You are giving me hope that I might actually be able to pull that off.

So, thank you.

I like the idea of titles and certificates too. Yes, make them up. I go from General Jodi, to my preferred title lately, Commander. (just Commander, no name.) Other days I am not as bossy. But some days, it helps me make the A/R calls, talk about contracts and all the other grown up stuff.

Dean - That is one hell of a poem. Thanks.

Lost
by David Wagoner

Stand still. The trees ahead and bushes beside you
Are not lost. Wherever you are is called Here,
And you must treat it as a powerful stranger,
Must ask permission to know it and be known.
The forest breathes. Listen. It answers,
I have made this place around you.
If you leave it, you may come back again, saying Here.
No two trees are the same to Raven.
No two branches are the same to Wren.
If what a tree or a bush does is lost on you,
You are surely lost. Stand still. The forest knows
Where you are. You must let it find you.

If you really feel you need a degree, I have a couple of suggestions. One: design your own. Two: buy one.