Searches, we get searchesâ„¢ (Haiku edition)

searchesIt pains me to report that the communicatrix, a.k.a. "That Boneheaded Idiot," lost an entire post's worth of searches while getting all fancy-pants with the transfer of items from Entourage holding pen to TypePad publishing glory. However, in the spirit of making delightful, refreshing beverages from sour, inedible fruits, she is using her anger-turned-inwards to craft a newer, better 5/7/5 meter.

That's right, cats & kitties, this Friday, "Searches" is rockin' that most time-honored of poetic forms, the haiku*.

Read 'em and weep. Or whatever else the spirit moves you to do...

xxx c


communicatrix: (Google) RYAN SEACREST in frye boots, (Google) powered by typepad (Google)

"A Hero Ain't Nothin' But An Order of Freedom Fries"

self rightious virgo, (Google) define chacon a son gout! (Google) (french swears? zut alors...) (Google)

"There Are No Free Lunches, Pal"

Write to change your life (Yahoo) Daniel Chu, copywriter! (Google) shop now! pay later! (Yahoo)

"The Secret of Life"

giant labia (Google) how to make people happy (Yahoo) labia redux (Google)

"Ode on Harriet the Spy"

dasani tastes like... (Google) the late great Louise Fitzhugh! (Google) I hated Spanglish. (Google)

*All poems made from ACTUAL SEARCHES landing people at Search engines (in parentheses) are provided for authentication purposes only, and do not count toward syllabic allotment. Some punctuation has been added for reasons of aesthetics/humor/caprice.