Cheering the Hell Up, Day 16: Peace & quiet is the flip side of childlessness

solitude A former partner used to hammer me on the subject of children and the importance of family with the warning that if I chose not to have the former and spend a lot of time with the latter, I would end up alone, and, by extension, miserable.

While the game is (I hope) far from over, I'm fairly sure he was wrong. There is something to be said for blood being thicker than water, but spending a shitload of Sundays splashing around in the gene pool ain't necessarily the answer to the question of happiness; spending time and effort building relationships built upon a foundation of truth and mutual respect probably is. I live a life resplendent with love, friendship and joy thanks to the many who sign on every day with their heads and hearts, regardless of shared DNA.

Don't get me wrong: I have nothing against children and family; they're just not top priorities for me. Or, if you like, I'm not judging, "I'm just sayin'," as the kids say*.

What has always been top priority for me is seeking truth. For whatever reason, I need copious amounts of alone time to do it, so spawning and/or adopting would be irresponsible. My only regret is that it took me so long to see this and put a name to it. I caused a lot of people unnecessary pain because I was such a clueless doofus. If any of you are reading this now, I apologize.

My wish for everyone is to find the thing that truly makes you tick and run with it. Reorganize your life around it. Make no apologies for it. Make no excuses for staying away from it.

But along with it, consider cultivating an understanding and appreciation for the choices you didn't make, and some understanding for the people who did. If you have questions about how they live their lives, perhaps mull them over to yourself before shouting about it from the rooftops or your AM radio show.

Some of us really need the peace and quiet...

xxx c

*Although having seen the impact of high population on our tiny earth, I'd feel better if some people weren't reproducing with such zeal.

Photo by rbaez via Flickr, used under a Creative Commons license