What do I love after I've been sucked dry and spit out by a 21-Day Saluteâ„¢? I loves me a meme!
Like the title sez, 8 utterly random facts about the communicatrix:
1. The first "rock" concert I went to was Sonny & Cher.
2. The, um, second "rock" concert I went to was also Sonny & Cher.
3. When I first started elementary school, someone got the bright idea I should be moved up a grade. But I hated the second graders so much I cried until the nuns let me go back to first. My promotion lasted a total of three hours, and started me off on a lifetime of manipulation through deviosity.
4. I lived in a bubble of privileged belovedness that was forever rent when I attended Cimarroncita Ranch Camp in Taos, New Mexico, during the summer between seventh and eighth grade. My very good friend of seven years, Alexis LeBlanc*, washed her hands of me at some point when the train that brought us from Chicago passed through Texas and her "real" friends, the ones who'd been going to CRC since they were wee tykes, got on. From that point on, I was openly reviled, mocked and tortured until my return home, the nadir of my experience being the ingestion of FOUR!!! COUNT 'EM! FOUR!!! squares of Ex-Laxâ„¢, administered under highly false pretenses. I and my colon, temporarily renamed "the greased chute", spent 24 hours in the infirmary, and after a good talking-to, the girls dialed down the hatred to a simmering-but-dormant "yellow alert" status.
I would like to say I told Alexis LeBlanc to eff off and that I have never been mean since, but in truth, while I never trusted her again, I hewed to the old "keep your enemies closer" line when it came to Lexy**. And was slightly less mean where the rubber met the road.
5. My favorite thing in the whole, wide, wonderful world is to make someone laugh who's not given to it.
6. If I am in a deep funk, nothing sets me to rights like a viewing of Car Wash, The Magnificent Seven or Superstar.
7. I have had sex here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, and here.
8. I have been driving around for over two months with 30 lbs. of unused fabric I've been meaning to donate to my costume designer friend, Ann Closs-Farley, and I'm hoping this meme shames me into actually unloading it from my car.
Thank you, Rob Kendt. And now, it's time for these eight merry reindeer to chime in...
- Bonnie Gillespie
- Dave Greten
- Chris Glass
- Anne Sertich
- Danny Miller
- Neil Kramer
- Jenny Amadeo
- Brandon Rogers (that's right, motherf*cker, go find a guest blog spot to kill off this damned meme)
xxx
c
*Not her real name
**Not her real nickname
Image of me, circa 1974, along with my five merry Torquemadas and the adult who was supposedly in charge of preventing this kind of Animal Farm-foolery